Cult Church Hate Mail

Sweet, I got hate mail, now I'm a real blogger! This actually came in months ago, but I didn't get a chance to post it until now.

The e-mail is from Demetria head (dchlegend@yahoo.com) and was titled "your disturbingly, ignorant pictures of the Church". The pictures, you see, were ignorant, not me. But they can't respond, so I will. Don't worry, the misuse of commas will continue throughout the rest of the e-mail.

It's important to note that Demetria seems to have CC'd this e-mail to just about everyone she knows. Here's the CC line:
"barbie7@iwon.com; tabitha head; scorpio2live@yahoo.com; Pewee"

Demetria never actually gives a specific URL, line of text, or webpage title, so I'm just guessing she's mad about one of these two pages:
1) Blog post: 11-2004
2) Blog post: 1-2005

"First of all, it's not a cult church, as I could easily call you the "atheist kid" or the "ignorant, lost, pathetic, soul" playing around church property at 3 in the morning. You should have been arrested for tresspassing on property that has nothing to do with you and your strange, midnight prowling. I don't get it. You need to go to school if you haven't already, and learn that the name Omega is a greek name, therefore, it makes sense to have a greek letter or symbol to represent that (duh). You need to pick up that good, educational book called the Bible and learn the significance of the sword, and thoroughly absorb the book of Revelation."

Demetria, there are a couple of issues with this paragraph:

First, and perhaps most important, name-calling is generally not a good way to make a point with people. And I'm not exactly sure how the phrase 'atheist kid' can be used as an insult anyway...

Second of all, in a debate, people generally do not start out by assuming that people with different opinions than them are ignorant. This usually has bad consequences, or leads to you underestimating people.

Third, you built your church on a busy street in the city of Philadelphia. Thus, seeing it does not necessarily involve trespassing.

Finally, it seems that you don't understand the significance of the Omega. First of all, it's a Greek letter, not a Greek name (or any kind of name). My point about the Omega is two-fold (you missed both parts):


I'll address the rest of my justification for labelling you a cult soon.

"I am sick and tired of pathetic, don't have a life, ignorant Christian Bashers like you , trying to find something wrong with the christian world. You obviously don't understand anything about it. Do you even know what a pentagram is? Maybe you are more familiar with it than you'd like for anyone to know. Maybe you are the real cult. I'm surprised that you didn't melt when you touched the symbol, "cult boy". "

Again, the name calling is a little out of place. I'm starting to feel like I'm on the playground in 3rd grade, Demetria. Calling someone a 'Christian Bashers' because they disagree with you won't make you right.

Did you accuse me of not knowing what a pentagram is, and then of knowing too much? Where was that going? That was a bit of a weak premise for labelling me a devil-worshipper.

I can't be the 'real cult'. People aren't cults.

And I don't generally melt when I touch things, because I am not the Wicked Witch of the West. I don't think you should be putting up symbols that attempt to melt people in the middle of Philadelphia...

Okay, I'm just making fun of you now. But seriously, what was I supposed to do with this paragraph?

"The next time you are on the prowl,looking for churches to break into, bring a real camera, not a cheap camera phone. And you may want to sit down and take the time to PRAY first. Are you familiar with that?

Now post this!!!

Demetria Head"

We're assuming I was going to break in now? Is it because it was 3AM? I've never considered hours-you-are-generally-awake-at to be a valid judge of character, or criminal intent. Demetria will never be friends with any night-shift workers (or college students).

But, at last, Demetria says one actual thing, which is that she doesn't like the quality of my photos. Yeah, neither do I (although Jeff took a few of the church pictures too). But, I can't afford anything better right now. Maybe if I had more megapixels, Demetria wouldn't think I'm a devil worshipper.

Here's some more on why the Church of the Apostolic Faith is a cult, or cult-like:

You could start with this article here, which is a fairly interesting dissection of their internal politics: Cultlink - Shelton expose.

Or try this article, written by a church member who wasn't even intending to show that you are a cult, but did a great job anyway: Millions on Lonely Splinters Now In Despair.

My version is much more condensed:

First, your church is based on the belief that the holy trinity was a progression, not a simultaneous existence. This is essentially trivial to Christianity. More importantly, it's based on the ambiguity of some words in the English translation of the Bible, which allows for some wordplay when discussing the trinity. The reason that no Biblical scholars agree with this idea is because the same ambiguity does not exist in the original languages, and so it is entirely an artifact of the translation.

With this in mind, there are two scenarios about how your church got started:


The above CultLink article on your finances seems to support (2). If you aren't convinced yet, then look at the leadership of your church. Instead of choosing leaders based on religious education, experience, or skill, you have a monarchy. Only family members of your founder can lead the church. There are again two reasons to create this system:


For more information on the word-play beliefs of the The Church of The Lord Jesus Christ of the Apostolic Faith, try their website, complete with blinking marquee tags.